Everyone has a clear picture of what parenthood is supposed to be like—fulfilling, joyful & the ultimate life goal. However, there are sides to the being a parent gig that don’t get enough attention. Here are eleven of those less-talked-about opinions. You know the type—the ones that make you pause and think, “Hmm, I hadn’t thought about that.”
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Kids Don’t Guarantee a Fulfilled Life
We often hear that having kids is a guarantee for a happy life. But happiness & fulfillment are personal—they come from a ton of different places, not just from having children. Some people find their happiness in careers or hobbies. There are many paths to feeling fulfilled and having kids is only one option on the menu.
Parenting Can Be Tough on Relationships
You might think having kids will bring you closer to your partner & family. Sometimes, though, it does the opposite as the constant demands of parenting can leave little time for other relationships. This causes stress & tension. While it’s a rather common side to parenting, it’s not something that people speak about a lot.
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Say Goodbye to Spontaneity
Once you have kids, your personal freedom practically disappears. Forget impromptu road trips or binge-watching your favorite show until 3 AM—your schedule is no longer your own. Instead, your life revolves around nap times and school runs. It’s a big change that certainly takes some getting used to.
Parenthood Isn’t for Everyone
Not everyone is cut out for parenthood and that’s totally okay. Some people simply don’t have the desire or temperament for parenting—that’s rather important. Without this drive, you can’t expect to be happy or make sure any potential kids are happy, either. Parenting shouldn’t be what we expect of everyone.
Kids Don’t Owe Their Parents Anything
Some people believe that kids should be forever grateful to their parents for bringing them into the world and providing for them. However, kids didn’t ask to be born and the idea they owe their parents something just for being alive is wrong. Instead, parenthood should involve giving without expecting a payback.
It’s Okay to Have Regrets
Admitting that you might regret becoming a parent is taboo even though it shouldn’t be. After all, parenting is rather complicated—it’s normal to have mixed feelings about it. Opening up about the challenges & acknowledging that it’s not all perfect is healthy. And in some cases, it’s necessary.
The Legacy Argument Is Overrated
Some people argue that having kids is important for leaving a legacy. However, since there are billions of people on our planet, the idea that your legacy hinges on having descendants is old-fashioned. Making a difference in the world doesn’t necessarily require passing on their genes. Instead, you can do this through your actions & contributions to society.
The Joy of Silence and Order
The peace & order of a child-free home is a bliss beyond belief. While our culture equates a house full of kids with happiness, admitting that you enjoy silence and a tidy space without toys strewn everywhere is almost a sin. But it shouldn’t be! A happy home doesn’t have to include children—it just needs a lot of smiles.
Parenthood Isn’t the Ultimate Womanhood Test
The belief that a woman must become a mother to fully realize her femininity or womanhood is utterly false. Womanhood and motherhood aren’t the same thing! Fulfillment & femininity come in many forms—bearing children is just one of the many different ways a woman can express her identity, not the only way.
Overpopulation Concerns Are Valid
Many environmentalists choose not to have children as a stance against overpopulation. Can you blame them? Our planet is dealing with awful environmental challenges and one of the best ways to help, according to these believers, is to limit population growth. It’s an unpopular opinion, that’s for sure.
Raising Pets vs. Raising Kids
Ask any pet parent and they’ll tell you that raising pets can be as rewarding (if not more so) than raising children. There’s nothing wrong with having “fur babies” as a substitute for human ones! In fact, many pet parents speak about the deep bonds & lower financial costs that come with having fur babies. Let’s not forget how much easier it is for your emotions, too!
Disclaimer: This list is solely the author’s opinion based on research and publicly available information.
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