In an era where gender norms have evolved, and responsibilities have become more gender-neutral, a dysfunctional family finds it challenging to keep pace. Recently, a social media user found himself caught in a storm and turned to the public for opinions on the situation.
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The Original Poster (OP) began by expressing his admiration for his brother, his brother’s wife Rachel, and their two children. Rachel had a part-time, work-from-home job and handled all house chores. OP also noticed that Rachel cared for her children single-handedly, curating a strict schedule for herself. Rachel told OP that she would wake up at 5 in the morning, clean the house, and prepare the meals for the family. OP found some of her house-management tips and tricks to be useful for their chores as well.
As days passed by, OP’s brother lost his job. Rachel took it upon herself and rejoined her full-time job to support the family finances. Meanwhile, OP’s brother decided to stay home and keep up with all the house chores and managing the children. Everyone thought it was easy for him since the children studied in kindergarten and first grade.
OP quickly realized that his brother found it difficult to manage it alone. So, OP occasionally helped him out. However, after repeated trials, OP concluded that his brother could not do the basics well. Some examples of his irresponsible behavior were the messy house and the children being dropped off late at school, despite OP’s brother being unemployed.
OP also cut him slack for being new at these responsibilities and occasionally dropped off the children at school. But his lazy acts could not hide under the covers as he did not even prepare food for the children. What was coming next was no shocker as the hardworking wife could not ignore the unkempt house and frequent school complaints.
After days of chaos, OP shared that the couple had a heated argument over their individual responsibilities. The situation escalated when OP’s brother claimed that it was all too sudden and new for him, and he was trying his best to adapt. OP couldn’t remain silent any longer; he confronted his brother about his lack of responsibility and accountability, comparing him to Rachel. He also pointed out that with no job, his brother had plenty of free time at home to at least sweep the floor once in 8 hours.
Things took a dramatic turn when OP’s brother impulsively resorted to name-calling, adding to the family drama. Even his mother jumped into the fray, accusing OP of going too far.
Later, his mother apologized to Rachel after seeing the school complaints and messy kitchen pictures. She warned OP’s brother to either step up or leave the house. As of now, the situation remains uncertain, and OP is seeking unbiased opinions on the matter.
ThisIsTheCaptain criticized OP for sugar-coating his brother’s behavior. Commenter said, “Sugarcoating wouldn’t have made your point any less valid. This (being a SAHF) is his job now and he is under-performing. Maybe this subpar work effort is why he lost his other job to begin with.”.
Garden Quartz emphasized not condoning laziness, especially when one family member is giving their all. They argued that being lazy is no excuse for not having the time to learn basic household responsibilities.
Dizzy_Cantaloupe_388 believed that threatening divorce was an excessive step and pointed out the emotional state of OP’s brother after losing his job. The user further added, “He’s had years to learn from his wife and never took any interest assuming she would always be the one to do everything, and now he’s hopefully finally appreciating how hard she works to keep everything in order.”
Most users sided with OP and Rachel regarding the stay-at-home-father’s laziness and lack of accountability. However, many also emphasized the importance of letting the man learn from his mistakes.
These observations shed light on the shifting dynamics of familial roles, particularly in cases of ill-fitted role reversals. The situation serves as a valuable lesson in evolving family roles and responsibilities.
Would you spare the SAHF for his deeds, or were OP’s reactions over the top? Let us know in the comments below.
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