Modern dating feels more like you’re playing a game than getting to know a real human being, and it’s thanks to all that swiping & ghosting. In the middle of this circus, we’ve sadly lost a few normal things. Some of them were sweet, some of them were awkward, and here are thirteen of them. When was the last time you remember experiencing these?
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Speaking to someone’s parents first
You once had to build up the courage to call someone’s home, and then pray that their dad didn’t answer. It’s not really a thing anymore. Nobody under 30 even has a landline anymore, and nobody’s ringing them, either. DMs & texts are the way to someone’s heart. Even if that means we’ve lost some of the charm of calling up first.
Waiting to hear back without worrying
After leaving a message, you used to just wait, for however long. It was no big deal. Now, though, it’s quite a different story, because when someone doesn’t text back within, like, 3 hours, it’s the end of the world. Did I say something wrong, and are they ghosting me because of it?
Getting to know someone without Google
First dates were a time for real surprises because there was no other way to learn about someone, except through word-of-mouth, maybe. These days, people scope out a potential partner’s dog’s name & their LinkedIn profile as soon as they match. They just want any information that’s easily accessible online when they go on a date.
Dating someone from your neighborhood
People used to meet their new loves at the local coffee shop, perhaps even through mutual friends who lived in the building. But it’s much easier now to swipe through people who live 50 miles away. That neighbor who could be the perfect match for you is someone you’ll never meet. The dating pool’s much bigger now.
Going on dates without long messaging
Whenever you wanted to go on a date in the past, you’d just send a message to someone or call them up & get things sorted. It’s way more complicated nowadays. Instead, you have to spend 2 weeks texting each other & share at least 20 memes before canceling your reservations a couple of times. And then maybe, just maybe, you’ll meet up.
Waiting to see what someone looked like
Dating was once more of a physical experience, where you’d only really see what someone looked like on a first date. Even if you met them before, you might not have remembered what they look like. Yet now, you’re able to scroll through ten selfies & check their tagged photos. A first date is to make sure the person from the photos is real.
Going on dates without expectations
Similarly, going on a date used to be a relaxed way of seeing if you clicked with the other person. There was no big build-up or pressure to define anything straight away. People showed up to figure things out as they went, which is rather different from today. There’s a mental checklist on both sides, as you both try to figure out if it’s a situationship or something more.
Not having 10 different labels
Once upon a time, there was one word for dating, and that was it. You liked each other & went out, telling other people that you were dating. But these days, people would rather say they’re “kinda seeing each other” or “in a situationship” than being honest. It feels like they put more effort into the names than, y’know, actually dating. What a shame.
Flirting without emojis or GIFs
A wink used to be a real wink, with your face, but emojis have replaced that. People would rather flirt through stickers or memes, which is still fun, yet also kinda impersonal. Why not just say you like someone instead of sending them a dozen pictures?
Asking someone out without screens
Before screens took over, you’d ask someone out directly if you wanted to go on a date. It was in-person & face-to-face, which didn’t always go down well, but at least it was straightforward. Today, people are more comfortable with starting things online. Yeah, there’s less risk, yet it also takes less guts, and some people never even get around to meeting up.
Actually breaking up
Nowadays, most people slowly disappear from a relationship by ghosting or giving shorter replies. Then they say nothing at all. That’s quite different from the past, when it was more common to break things off with an actual sentence. Everyone just accepts that it’s normal to give no closure or explanation. It’s not right.
Keeping your dating life private
There was no need to tell anyone about your dating life unless it got serious. At the most, you’d tell your best friend. But modern dating has killed off this sense of privacy, so now every mildly interesting conversation gets shared on social media. People aren’t even together, and everyone knows about their situation.
Dating someone because you felt something
You’d meet someone at a friend’s thing or during class, whatever, and then they’d grow on you. There wasn’t really any other way to meet people. As such, you’d date them because you were interested in them, not simply because they looked good online. Oh, how things have changed.
Disclaimer: This list is solely the author’s opinion based on research and publicly available information.
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