Looking back on life often brings valuable lessons, and in one of our recent surveys, senior single women shared the regrets they wish they could change.
Overworking youth
They spent their 20s and 30s so obsessed with their careers that they planned to catch up with their personal lives later. But at 70 years old, career achievements don’t provide much comfort or companionship.
They regret spending their youthful, carefree years trying to climb the corporate ladder, only to be replaced by a younger worker when they retire.
Shelving romance
After a gut-wrenching breakup or a turbulent divorce in their 30s or 40s, many women decided they just didn’t want the hassle of relationships anymore. Sure, it worked, and they avoided drama for a while.
But they shut the door on any chance of finding a healthy, long-term partner. At 70, they wish they hadn’t let one experience ruin their chances of pursuing love again.
Skipping travel
Without a partner to split fares and airplane seats, many single women kept putting off their dreams of extensive travel. Perhaps they believed they’d later find someone who could go with them someday, or they just didn’t feel comfortable being in foreign places entirely by themselves.
Now at age 70 and losing mobility, they bitterly regret their missed adventures during their youth.
People pleasing
Some women spent years, sometimes decades, appeasing relatives, friends and bosses instead of pursuing their own innermost yearnings. Many women felt burdened with being the go-to caregiver for everyone else because they weren’t preoccupied with a spouse or children.
At 70, they wish they’d learned to say no earlier so they could preserve some time for themselves and their dreams.
Buying insecurities
Women often look at old pictures when they are 70 and marvel at how they spent so much time and energy criticizing their bodies.
They worried about their weight, wrinkles or style for years, letting society’s idea of beauty steal their body confidence. They bitterly regret not understanding earlier that youthful health is beautiful just the way it is.
Fearing loneliness
In their younger days, the thought of being alone terrified them. Oftentimes, this scared them into dating someone they weren’t really that compatible with just to avoid being lonely.
At 70 years old, they’ve gained a stubborn independence and know their own self is the best company they can keep. They wish they didn’t spend so many years fearing being alone and had embraced the peace and freedom it brought.
Holding grudges
Some women said that holding grudges against ex-lovers, rival friends or estranged family members made them feel strong and armored when they were younger. By the time they reach 70, all of those old grudges feel pointless and a heavy burden to bear. They wish they had let go sooner.
Small circles
Disconnecting on purpose or letting friendships slip away due to a hectic lifestyle results in a retired single woman with an alarmingly small support system years down the road.
Once retired and friends start moving away or dying, some suddenly notice the absence of regular human interaction.  They wish they had put more regular effort into cultivating a strong, cross-generational group of friends.
Unexpressed feelings
They regret not speaking up at moments that called for uncomfortable, brutal honesty. Whether they didn’t say they loved someone or concealed their needs from their partner, their silence altered the course of their life.
They’re sorry they allowed pride or fear of rejection to prevent them from telling the truth as they saw it.
Financial timidity
So many women in this generation planned on a husband making those big investment decisions, buying real estate or aggressively saving for retirement. That husband never happened, and they played it too safe with their money.
Now at 70, they wish they had taken charge of their financial future and learned how to play the wealth game decades ago.
Rejecting help
Coming from a place of having to do everything by themselves, many independent women cultivated a hard-as-nails exterior that believed asking for help was weak.
They declined offers to help from neighbors, friends, and family members because they wanted to do it all by themselves. They wish they’d let people help because it only makes communal bonds stronger.
Neglecting health
Without a spouse or immediate family member on their tail, it’s amazingly simple to overlook nagging pains, skip checkups, or fall off track with diet.
A lot of single ladies put career, children, or elderly parents first and fail to place their own body maintenance higher on the list. When they reach 70, they wish they had treated their daily health as a non-replaceable gift that needed safeguarding.
Postponing joy
Looking back at their life, single women’s biggest regret at 70 is waiting too long to really live. They regret waiting for the perfect future time when they’d allow themselves to buy that nice china, decorate their dream house, or throw parties.
They wish they had learned earlier that happiness doesn’t need a witness to be completely valid.
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