Medical professionals are the unsung heroes of our healthcare system, but sometimes, they can say the weirdest things. We’ve scoured social media threads to uncover some of the quirkiest and most surprising comments made by doctors, dentists, and nurses during routine checkups. While they might leave you scratching your head, these anecdotes are a testament to the unique blend of humor and expertise that medical professionals bring to their work.
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#1 The Asymmetrical Face Revelation
“When I was like 20, my endocrinologist took a good look at me and asked, ‘Are you okay with your face being so asymmetrical?’ I had never really noticed it before, but boy, have I noticed it since!”
This comment reminds us that doctors sometimes have a knack for pointing out the things we’ve blissfully ignored. It’s like getting a surprise mirror to your imperfections. Thanks, doc!
#2 Wisdom Teeth Wonder
“When I was 12, I had a dentist say, ‘Hold on, I think I might be counting wrong. You shouldn’t have those yet… okay, never mind. Those are definitely your wisdom teeth. Your mouth is just huge, I guess.’ They said it was the youngest they’ve ever seen anyone get their wisdom teeth. They called in every dentist in the building to come look at my mouth.”
This story is a testament to the unexpected surprises that can pop up during a dental checkup. We’re sure no one likes to hear how huge their mouth is.
#3 The Persistent Chicken Bone
“I had a really weird throat issue. It didn’t hurt; it just felt like something was stuck in there. I had been a vegetarian for years at this point, and the doctor said I likely had a chicken bone stuck in there. Wouldn’t take no for an answer.”
Vegetarianism and chicken bones? It’s a strange combination. This doctor’s insistence on the presence of a phantom chicken bone shows that medical professionals should always rely on evidence, rather than quirky hunches.
#4 The IV Expert
“This is no joke. I had a medical professional say, ‘I used to be a Heroin addict, so I’m pretty good at this.’ As she was putting in my IV, I laughed so hard.”
Humor in the face of medical procedures can be a great icebreaker. This medical professional’s unconventional introduction lightened the mood, but left a lot of questions unanswered about how they turned their life around.
#5 The Dignity Dilemma
“‘This is the part where all your dignity goes out the window. I’m going to tape your penis to your abdomen.'”
Medical procedures can often lead to awkward and uncomfortable moments, and this candid remark exemplifies that. This doctor should have just gone on with the procedure, rather than make things so awkward with that remark.
#6 A Testicle Tease
“Following a checkup…’we’re going to have to remove your testicles….just kidding, you should’ve seen your face.'”
This cheeky remark from a medical professional is a testament to their ability to put patients at ease with a well-timed joke. It’s all part of the doctor’s toolkit, including a sense of humor.
#7 The AIDS Scare
“Was living in a foreign country and had a cold/flu type illness. Went to the doc, and he comes in eating a bowl of cereal. Already weird. Checks some things and says, ‘Do you know what AIDS is’? I’m in complete shock and say yes, I do. He follows up with, ‘It’s a virus, and there is no cure’. Goes on to explain why there is no cure, all while I’m seeing my life over as I know it. Finally ends with, ‘But you don’t have that virus, you have a different one, much more common and treatable, but I wanted you to understand why an antibiotic wouldn’t work’.”
This bizarre medical encounter takes the cake for its unexpected turn of events. The patient may not have had AIDS, but his heart likely skipped a beat or two!
#8 The Slow Metabolism Silver Lining
“I had a doctor tell me that my metabolism is so slow that I would do very well in an apocalypse.”
While a slow metabolism might not be everyone’s dream, this doctor’s hilarious spin on it turns a potential concern into an unlikely superpower. Who knew a sluggish metabolism could be a survival advantage?
#9 The Pin Replacement Pep Talk
“My surgeon, during surgery to replace pins in my broken finger that had been pushed out by my own body – ‘I’m really getting them in there this time, you little freak of nature.'”
This surgeon’s candid remark adds a human touch to a medical procedure. It’s a reminder that even in the operating room, a dash of humor can help ease the tension. It’s as if the surgeon momentarily stepped out of their sterile, clinical role and became more relatable, acknowledging the quirks and surprises that medicine sometimes throws at them.
#10 Unexpected Matchmaking
“My son is about your age and single. Do you want his number?”
The unexpected offer likely should have remained in the doctor’s mind. Not many patients would want their doctor to see them as part of the future family.
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