No one’s pointing fingers here because most Boomers aren’t deliberately trying to stress out their adult kids. But in all honesty, many of the habits that made sense in the 70s or 80s don’t fit with how life works now, and many boomers still act like things haven’t changed. Here are thirteen ways some Boomers unknowingly make life harder for their kids. Are you guilty of doing any of these?
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Refusing Help With Technology
Anybody with at least one boomer parent will remember the time they spent 45 minutes trying to explain how to reset a password to them over the phone. Their parents claim they don’t see the button. Boomers who won’t learn even basic tech stuff are forcing their children to be their unpaid IT support, and it gets exhausting when it’s the fourth call this week.
Keeping Money Secrets
There are also a few boomers who treat financial details like national security, and they refuse to reveal what accounts exist or what’s paid off. They won’t even admit where they’ve buried the life insurance paperwork. As soon as an emergency happens, their kids are left piecing together clues and trying to work out the next steps.
Giving Unwanted Advice About Parenting
While a boomer’s kid is feeding their toddler organic fruit, out of nowhere comes a comment about how giving the youngest one soda in a bottle is perfectly fine. Many of our boomer friends share their two cents about parenting to anyone who will listen. Sadly, it’s not always helpful. It’s hard for the younger generation to hear these comments without arguing back.
Expecting Grandkids But Offering No Childcare
Many boomers will drop some not-so-subtle hints about wanting grandbabies as soon as they hear their kids are in a relationship. But a few years later, some of them will claim they’re “too busy” or “too tired” to help with the baby, even for just an hour. They want the title of grandparent without any of the drama.
Sharing Outdated Financial Advice
Of course, boomers mean well when they encourage their children to buy a starter home. But they don’t realize that interest rates are no longer under 5%. They don’t understand that houses now cost far more than a decent year’s salary. As a result, a lot of boomer money advice is a little outdated.
Refusing to Downsize Their Home
Ask a boomer why they’re still living in a five-bedroom house, even though it’s just them and the cat, and you’ll likely hear the same line. “I raised my kids here.” Meanwhile, their adult kids are trying to find affordable places in the same zip code, which is practically impossible. Empty nesters have all the good properties, yet they’re refusing to give them up.
Expecting to Age In Place Without a Plan
Speaking of homes, some of them swear they’ll stay in their home forever, but they never get around to installing grab bars, for example. They don’t name a power of attorney or make any sort of backup plan. Then something happens, like a fall or a health scare, and their kids are left to organize everything. Figuring out care and insurance for an older person isn’t easy.
Acting Like Healthcare is Still Affordable
Likewise, boomers sometimes tell their kids to get their health issues checked out immediately, without realizing that even a basic checkup isn’t always in the budget. They had affordable insurance and lower deductibles. These days, a lot of people are simply hoping for the best, instead of getting a proper health check, because they’ve got no other financial option.
Dismissing Mental Health Conversations
Talking about therapy with a boomer parent is sometimes a little difficult, as they’ll question what anyone has to be anxious about. For many of them, mental health isn’t something you talk about, and they lack the emotional vocabulary to do so. This makes real support rather impossible, especially when all you need is someone to listen, not lecture.
Pressuring Kids Into Traditional Careers
A common boomer belief is that if you’re not in an office wearing slacks and holding a stapler, you’re not working a “real” job. As a direct result, many boomers see a kid who’s launching a freelance design business or working remotely as unemployed. They don’t mean harm, though, because they don’t really see how things have changed so much.
Some Still Have A Landline Mentality
According to boomers, you’re utterly rude if you don’t answer your phone, and that’s because this generation hasn’t really adjusted to changes in technology. They don’t get how texting or voice notes have replaced phone tag. As a result, they’ll call in the middle of the workday and then call again two hours later, wondering why no one picked up.
Saying “We Did It Without Help”
Some boomers were able to raise three kids and buy a house without ever hiring a babysitter. Of course, they also had low housing costs and job security, as well as neighbors who didn’t mind pitching in, which made things easier. But a lot of them don’t recognize that. Instead, they imply today’s parents are merely lazy, which just isn’t fair.
Confused About Changing Social Norms
Some boomers aren’t actually even confused about how society has changed, and they’ll just sarcastically talk about how they “don’t know what to say anymore.” Yes, the rules have changed, but not so drastically that basic conversation without offending someone is impossible.
Disclaimer: This list is solely the author’s opinion based on research and publicly available information.
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