Some of the most common lies aren’t grand schemes at all, but rather, little things people say when the truth feels awkward or too much for the moment.
The automatic answer to ‘How are you?’
It doesn’t matter how terrible your day might actually be because, chances are, you say you’re ‘fine’ without even thinking about it. You could be annoyed, and you could be exhausted. But that’s not important anymore.
We all have those times when we hide how we’re actually feeling during conversations, and we try to deliberately tone down the emotions on our faces. The answer, ‘I’m fine’ is usually disconnected from what’s going on underneath.
Somehow, the calendar is suddenly full
There are those times when a dinner invitation arrives and, weirdly enough, your week suddenly becomes packed. Sure, you could tell the other person the truth that you’d rather stay home. But that feels harsh. It’s even worse when the other person genuinely wants you there.
That’s why a lot of us make up an excuse and say we’re busy, even when we’re not. It’s a lot less awkward, for one. It’s also only a bit of a white lie, because you usually are busy. It’s just that you’re busy with an appointment with your couch, not anything important.
The convenient case of forgetfulness
One of the reasons ‘I forgot’ is such a common lie is because it’s so versatile. Maybe you did remember that you were supposed to do that chore or complete that favor, but you kept putting it off. Then admitting the truth feels uncomfortable. Forgetfulness gives you a much safer explanation.
You can’t exactly admit that your own choices had a part to play, so you lie and blame your poor memory instead. Nobody can see inside your memory, and they’ll have no idea whether or not you’re telling the truth.
Five minutes can mean almost anything
Let’s be honest, we’ve all told this lie at least a few times. You’re not even remotely close to being ready, but still, you lie and tell other people that you’re ‘basically ready.’ You don’t want them to know how unplanned you actually are.
It sounds bad saying that you need another 20 minutes, after all. Saying you’re nearly done makes everything appear a lot more manageable. The thing is, though, the question of whether anyone believes you after the third update is something else.
The gift-opening performance
We’ve all experienced that kind of panic when someone has given us a present we don’t actually like. You know the feeling. It’s the one where you have to smile and pretend to admire the thing in front of you, lying that you really enjoy the gift.
It’d hurt the other person’s feelings if we told them we really didn’t like their present. That’s not what we want to do. That’s why we lie and tell them that we liked it, even when we’re thinking about exchanging it for store credit at the same time.
Dinner gets a kinder review
Not every homemade meal deserves the enthusiastic response that it gets from other people. Some meals genuinely do taste bad. But most of us aren’t going to confess that, so we take a bite and give positive feedback instead.
We lie and say how much we love it, or that we wish we could have some more of it. It’s just better to hide the truth than to say how we really feel and cause some upset. That never goes down well.
The thing that supposedly doesn’t matter
It really hurts when you get left out. It hurts even more when someone makes a careless joke about you or says a comment that kind of hurts. Yet so many of us will insist these didn’t bother us, even though we’re thinking about them three hours later in the shower.Â
Most of us will try our hardest to look unbothered and keep the bothered side of us hidden. We tell people that it ‘didn’t hurt us.’ Nobody wants to seem like the annoying person causing drama, after all.
The conversation you mentally left
We nod, and we make eye contact while also throwing in a ‘right’ every so often. But the truth is that our brains left the conversation about two minutes ago. A lot of us lie and say that we’re still paying attention or listening, despite the fact that we’re not.
As long as we look attentive enough, we can usually get away with being a distracted listener. It all boils down to how you lie about listening, really.
The familiar face with no attached memory
Some of the most common lies come when we’re feeling particularly awkward. Take, for example, when someone comes over and says your name, but you have no idea who they are. They talk as though you know each other really well. You can’t remember who they are.
But you choose to keep that fact to yourself by nodding or laughing. You don’t want them to think that they’re unmemorable and that you couldn’t be bothered to remember them. It’s way easier to lie and say, ‘Of course I remember you.’
Agreement can be an exit door
Telling someone, ‘You’re right’ doesn’t always mean you think that. No, sometimes, we just say it because the conversation has been going in circles for way too long, and we’d like for it to stop now.Â
Lying and saying that to the other person is a quick way to stop the discussion. Perhaps you’re tired, or perhaps the argument isn’t worth another round. The reason doesn’t matter. We want it to be over, and so we’ll lie to achieve that.
Rejection often comes with softer wording
It’s hard to turn someone down, especially when you have a specific reason for doing so. It doesn’t even have to be during dating, either, as sometimes you’re just turning down a friend. But you don’t want to hurt the other person.
You choose to give a reason connected to something gentler and less personal. You don’t want to admit that it’s because of their looks or something in their personality. Yes, you’d rather give a nicer version of a much shorter answer.
Other people’s opinions still sneak through
Plenty of people insist that they couldn’t care less what anyone thinks. That is, right until somebody dislikes something they’ve done, or they have an opinion about them that kind of hurts. The truth is that what other people think affects how we see ourselves.
We’d rather pretend it doesn’t, though, so we lie and say that we couldn’t care less about other people’s opinions. It happens to us all. Even the people who aren’t desperate for other people’s approval do it because one little comment can lodge itself in our heads.
Sources: Please see here for a complete listing of all sources that were consulted in the preparation of this article.
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