First dates can be exciting, but they can also make you nervous. You want to make a good impression and get to know the other person without saying anything that might throw off the balance. Some questions might seem harmless but might come off as insensitive, awkward or too intimate. Dating consultants advise keeping some of this stuff off the table in the beginning to keep things fun & comfortable. Below are nine questions you shouldn’t ask on a first date — and one you should never ask at all.
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“Why Are You Still Single?”
This might be a harmless question, but it always feels judgmental. It makes the other person feel that they have to justify their life choices. Everyone has their own reasons for dating, so it’s better to focus on the future than questioning the past. Dating involves getting to know someone – and not making them feel that they need to explain everything to you.
“How Much Do You Make?”
Money is a sensitive subject, especially on a first date. Asking someone how much they make might seem snoopy or materialistic. Rather than discussing money, focus on interests, hobbies, or aspirations. These are much more interesting and allow you to get to know the person.
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“Do You Want Kids?”
Even if this is something to consider later, asking it on a first date is too much to handle. It’s a weighty question that can be putting the other person under pressure. Early dates should be casual and fun – so save the serious talk for after you know each other a bit.
“What Happened in Your Last Relationship?”
It’s never a good idea to ask about exes on a first date. It can bring up bad memories or give the other person the impression you are comparing them to another. A first date is about building a new relationship, not revisiting heartbreaks.
“Do You Think This Is Going Well?”
This is a question that will make your date feel pressured and make things awkward. It can feel like you’re fishing for compliments or are doubting yourself. Instead, go with the flow of the conversation and just have fun in the present moment.
“How Many People Have You Dated?”
Asking someone about their dating history can be overbearing and intrusive. You should care about who they are now – not how many people they have been with. Focus on their personality and common interests rather than history.
“Where Do You See This Going?”
First dates are too early to predict the future. This is an awkward question to ask because it makes you push the other person to define the relationship before it has even begun. Expect nothing and just let things go with the flow without many expectations.
“What’s Your Biggest Regret?”
This is another heavy question to bring into the first meeting. It could raise sensitive or personal topics we should just keep to ourselves. On a first date, try to be light-hearted and have fun while talking.
“Are You Seeing Anyone Else?”
There is nothing wrong with speculating whether a person is dating anyone else, but to ask directly might come across as insecure or possessive. You are still new to each other – so focus on you together and not anyone else.
Disclaimer: This list is solely the author’s opinion based on research and publicly available information.
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