9 things you shouldn’t say to an atheist

Some people casually say things to atheists without even thinking about it, but some of them do way more damage than they actually realize.

The private proof

Maybe you did go through something difficult. Maybe it did change your life. But that was your life. Don’t tell someone, ‘You wouldn’t say that if you’d seen what I’ve seen.’ Two people can live through exactly the same event.

They’ll come out believing different things. They’ll come out seeing the experience completely differently. The truth is, your experiences are yours. Someone else won’t reach the same conclusion. That’s life. 

The final warning

Sure, you think you’re showing concern. You say, ‘One day God will humble you.’ They’re supposed to understand, right? But no. It sounds like something bad is coming. It sounds like you’re happy about it. Really, atheists think you’re using suffering as a future argument. 

You’re predicting that they’ll suffer. That’s supposed to change their mind. They’ll start feeling uncomfortable, and they’ll remember the way you made them feel. Would you want to talk to someone who talks to you like that?

The mood label

So many believers preach this. They say, ‘Atheists are always so negative.’ That might be part of your experience. However, you can’t judge an entire group based on one person. So what if that one atheist from college was annoying? They’re not all the same.

Some of them barely talk about religion. Some of them are sarcastic. Yes, some of them are negative. Yet they’re as different as everyone else, and a lot of them don’t think you should hurt others. Kind of strange for someone committed to misery. 

A heavy question

It sounds deep to say, ‘So you think life has no meaning?’ It’s actually pretty lazy. No, being an atheist doesn’t mean you think nothing matters. You just don’t believe in God. Atheists still care about their families. They still value their friendships. 

They’re not in some existential crisis or anything. It’s just that their belief system is different from what believers think, and that doesn’t mean they think life is pointless. There’s a meaning. It’s different.

The low point

No, saying, ‘You’ll find God when you hit rock bottom’ isn’t helpful. It’s not a pearl of wisdom, either. It’s true that some people get sick and become more religious. It’s true that some people need religion to get out of a hole. But not everyone’s like that.

They lose people they love. They start asking harder questions. Then there are those who don’t ever change their views, and that’s because belief goes all sorts of different ways. Everyone feels pain. Believers do. Non-believers alike. There are no rules as far as pain’s concerned.

The lab coat line

It’s obvious when believers have run out of better arguments. They say things like, ‘You worship science.’ Science doesn’t even work like that. Atheists aren’t lighting candles for chemistry. They’re not singing songs to physics.

Science involves testing ideas. Science involves checking the evidence, finding out you’re wrong, and trying again. It’s a method. It’s not worship. Telling an atheist that they worship ‘science’ doesn’t do much for them. It says more about your frustration than an atheist’s beliefs.

The holiday trap

‘Why do you celebrate Christmas then?’ is a question atheists hear way too much. Christmas stopped being only a church holiday ages ago. It’s food. It’s movies.

You don’t need to be Christian to celebrate. You don’t even need to be religious. An atheist putting up a Christmas tree isn’t lying or trying to hide some sort of secret. It’s just Christmas, really.

The pity card

Saying, ‘I feel sorry for you’ might sound kind in your head. It comes across differently. It sounds pretty condescending. What exactly are you sorry for? Sorry they don’t think the same way as you? Sorry they’re not going to church? Atheists don’t feel spiritually empty.

They raise kids and pay bills like believers. They live fulfilling lives, too. You don’t need to believe in God to be moral. That’s why a line like that one feels so outdated. There’s no need to feel sorry for these people.

The founding argument

It’s true. ‘This country was built on God.’ Religion was a huge part of early American life. But let’s look at the facts, shall we? The Constitution never says Christianity was America’s official religion. The Treaty of Tripoli in 1797 also confirmed that.

But that’s not all. Saying a line like that makes it seem like atheists are anti-American. It makes it seem like they’re not truly patriotic because they don’t believe. It’s not fair. They’ve got the right to not believe.

Sources: Please see here for a complete listing of all sources that were consulted in the preparation of this article.