14 things that instantly make people respect you more

It’s the insignificant moments involving a person that tell you a lot about them, especially when they deliberately choose not to make themselves look bigger or smarter in some way.

No running commentary

Not every decision needs a closing argument to make it valid. Sometimes you can just say, ‘I can’t make it’ without the twelve-minute explanation with a ton of reasons. People respect anyone who can do that.

Yes, they admire those who can make a reasonable decision and don’t scramble to make their choice something for everybody to approve. It comes across as though the person speaking is more settled rather than defensive.

Credit travels backward

Giving praise always makes you look good, but it’s even better when there’s absolutely no chance the other person hears it. For example, you praise a colleague’s work when they’re not in the same room. The colleague can’t thank you or return the favor.

They might not even know it happened, and that’s exactly why it matters. People recognize when a person gives credit to the right individual when they’re not there to claim it. They’ll respect someone who can give recognition fairly, simple as that.

The little correction

Perhaps someone gets a name wrong in front of six people. It’d be the perfect opportunity to pounce and correct them, but no, you choose to keep the conversation moving. People really like people who can do that.

They respect someone who can fix a mistake without turning the person themselves into the mistake. Turns out, people work better when their ordinary mistakes aren’t made to be humiliating. Nobody needs a judge every time they do something wrong.

The question nobody asks

You might think that asking an obvious question makes you look stupid. It might actually have the opposite effect. A lot of people in the room probably have the same questions as you, and they’re too embarrassed to ask them.

So, they respect someone willing to step up and ask. They admire someone willing to risk looking uninformed for ten seconds, rather than pretend for half an hour, because it puts everyone at ease.

The joke stops here

Group teasing has a kind of momentum to it that’s sometimes hard to escape. One person makes a joke, and another adds a story, so the whole conversation turns into criticism of a person who isn’t there. But it doesn’t have to be that way.

Some people are willing to stand up and refuse to join in the group teasing. They don’t necessarily need to give a speech about kindness, but instead, they might say something like, ‘Leave him alone.’ People really respect someone who’s brave enough to do that. 

The promise from three weeks ago

Keeping your promise is always great, and it’s even better when it’s a small promise. You know, something like promising to send someone a link to an article. Doing it without being chased will get people’s attention. 

Nobody really expected you to remember something so small, especially since small promises are so easy to break. There aren’t usually any consequences attached to them, after all. That’s why someone who keeps them comes across as dependable, and people like it.

The conversation can end

Look at the way that some people deal with disagreements. You might find that one person says their final piece and leaves it at that, without trying to add more. They’ll simply say ‘Fair enough,’ or ‘I get what you mean,’ and end it there.

That doesn’t mean they gave up or that they won. No, it’s just a sign that they know when to stop arguing before the conversation gets silly, and people really like those who can do that. It shows what a person values.

The period after ‘wrong’

A lot of people are able to say, ‘I was wrong.’ But there are only a select few who can leave the sentence that way, without adding in ‘but also’ to the end. Admitting your failures and actually stopping there comes across pretty strongly.

You’ve deliberately avoided creating an opportunity to hide behind. Instead, you’ve openly said what you’ve done wrong, and that can really help with how trustworthy you seem. It does feel uncomfortable, of course, but that’s probably why it works.

The rule still applies

Nobody’s watching, or at least, you think that nobody’s watching. But you still do the good thing by returning the extra change or doing the boring part of the job properly. You keep the same rule you said mattered yesterday when you knew that people were around to see it. 

Such consistency really matters. It makes you easier to trust because it’s a good sign you’re not going to change your behavior, depending on the audience. You’re consistent. People really respect those who can do that, as it’s quite a rare trait these days.

The missing counterargument

It’s not always easy receiving criticism. Most people get defensive and desperate to prove that, actually, they’re not so bad after all. They’ll give evidence and context to support their defense, maybe a witness, too. Not everybody’s like that, though.

The people who earn the most respect are those who try to hear the whole thing before defending themselves. They’ll ask what made someone feel that way about them, and then they’ll listen. They take criticism so well that other people start thinking differently about them. 

The chair at the edge

Exclusion is sometimes invisible in a big group, and it might simply involve one person getting talked over all the time. Nobody asks what they think, and their joke gets missed. That is, until someone else stands up to bring them back into the conversation.

They don’t make a show of it. They simply ask the person what they were saying and what they think about a situation. The individual being included definitely recognizes the person who pulled them back in. They’re really going to respect them for that.

Their answer comes first

There’s one trick you might notice people use before sharing their opinion. They ask someone else for theirs. It sounds backward to anyone used to proving you know what you’re doing, but still, it can change the whole conversation. 

Asking someone for their opinion first gives them room to answer. It shows that you actually care to hear what other people believe, and they’ll appreciate you taking their knowledge seriously. It’s quite rare to see these days, which is why people respect those who do it.

Experience doesn’t get a veto

It’s usually pretty awkward when someone younger or less experienced says there’s a problem. It’s even worse when they’re giving feedback to someone older or more senior. But not all bosses behave that way.

Some of them are willing to check the facts and admit they’re wrong. People recognize that. They’re going to respect someone who doesn’t let their age and experience get in the way of the truth. Accepting the correction without getting prickly makes you look better than trying to wriggle out of it.

The mid-sentence correction

Exaggerations are so common that we don’t even recognize we’re making them sometimes. But there are those who do. Saying, ‘I’ve told him about ten times. Actually, no, maybe four,’ can do wonders for your credibility. Probably more than the original story ever could, honestly.

Nobody told you to correct yourself and reduce the exaggeration, but still, you did it anyway. People quickly learn which friends make every situation bigger or worse than it actually was. They respect those who openly edit their story in real time.

Sources: Please see here for a complete listing of all sources that were consulted in the preparation of this article.

15 things people wear that make others treat them with more respect instantly

A person’s clothing says a lot about them, and there are a few pieces that can make someone seem more established or professional without them saying a word.

15 things people wear that make others treat them with more respect instantly