There’s something about having a crush that makes you do things that, while they might seem perfectly reasonable at the time, become the kind of embarrassing memories you can’t quit thinking about when trying to fall asleep.
Suddenly having a fascinating conversation with someone else
We might not all admit it, but it’s true. We try to make our crush jealous when they’re around. We try to bait them into feeling something by talking to someone else who’s apparently very interesting. We start paying attention to everything else other than our crushes.
It’s as terrible as it sounds. We’re simply trying to get a reaction from our crush. The awkward part is that our crushes may assume that we like that other person. That’s not exactly what we were hoping for.
Turning the volume up
We’ve all been there. Our friend says something that’s a six out of ten funny at best, but then our crush walks past. Now their joke has become the greatest joke anyone has told in all of human history, and we laugh very hard to show it.
You might even throw in a slap on the table, just for dramatic effect. Romantic interest means that our sense of humor and laughter become way more noticeable. You really didn’t need to give that second giant laugh, but still, we do it anyway. How embarrassing.
The completely accidental encounter
It’s a complete coincidence that you and your crush just happened to be at the same place at the same time. At least, that’s what you tell them. The truth is that you probably knew they were going to be there all along, and you somehow found a reason to walk past them.
Then comes the funniest part. You know the one, where you pretend not to see them and become deeply interested in your phone. You do everything you can to seem casual. You’re anything but, though.
The post with one viewer in mind
Anyone who’s posted photos on social media has probably done this before. They take a dozen pictures, choose the best one, and then post it. They pretend they don’t care who reacts. But really, they’re checking the viewer list every so often for one specific name.
They care a lot about the impression they make online. In fact, they care a lot about the impression they’re making on one person and one person only. It’s embarrassing to admit that, but still, it’s true.
Developing a suspiciously timely hobby
You probably wouldn’t have thought about that new hobby a few days ago. But now, you’re fully invested in it because your crush mentioned liking it once. It’s the same story with that band you’d never really been into before.
Shared interests can make people feel closer, and that’s why many people try the hobbies their crushes are into. You’ll probably end up dropping the hobby soon enough. Or you might be really into it too, who knows?
Dropping the perfect topic nearby
Talking about your crush’s likes is almost like an art form. You can’t come out directly and mention it to them because that’d be weird. No, you casually bring up to another person the exact movie or musician you know they like, at the exact time your crush’s around.
Don’t forget about the volume, too. You’ve got to be loud enough for them to hear but also quiet enough that it’s not obvious. It’s a lot of effort, in all honesty. That’s why it’s so embarrassing to think about later on.
Asking the question you didn’t need answered
You don’t even need to ask what time the event starts. It’s written right there on the ticket, after all, yet you still decide to ask your crush about it. It gives you a reason to talk to them for thirty seconds without having to invent an actual conversation.Â
There’s also the fact that questions can help people connect. You may not have needed the information, yes, but you sure needed the interaction with the other person. That’s why it’s so cringe.
Suddenly becoming extremely occupied
There’s something about your crush walking into the room that makes sitting peacefully seem wrong somehow. No, you’ve got to look busy, perhaps even productive. You become way too interested in your phone, even though you’re probably tapping random buttons.
It’s kind of embarrassing how much we fake hard work when there’s someone attractive around. We could keep things normal. But apparently, that’s not good enough, and we have to fake our productivity instead.
Choosing the seat with suspicious precision
Physical contact is something you almost always want from a crush. That’s why you’ll probably end up choosing the seat that, miraculously, puts you directly next to your crush. Some people are less obvious about it and will choose seats in their crush’s line of sight. How convenient.
Research shows that always being around someone physically makes them appear more familiar over time. But it does get to a point when things become a little obvious. The fact you switch seats three times before settling on the ‘random’ one near them is quite telling.
Finding a very necessary reason to touch them
You’ll probably look for any excuse to touch them when you’re nearby, too. Apparently there’s lint on their sleeve that you just have to get rid of because, well, you’re kind. Sure. Physical contact is an important part of flirting and relationship development.
Any excuse will do, it seems. Perhaps you ask them whether their hands are cold or that you want to compare your hand sizes. Like that matters. It’s actually kind of funny how many excuses you might come up with just to touch them.
Editing ‘hey’ like it’s a legal document
It’s really not important that you’re sending a message only eight words long. But it’ll still take you around twenty minutes to send because you keep changing your mind. First there’s a smiley face, then there isn’t one because that seems too eager.
Perhaps you change it to a different one because the first one seemed really weird. Punctuation choices only make things even more challenging. We all become weirdly obsessive with the way we text when we’re talking to a crush, and it gets a bit ridiculous.
Pretending you didn’t see the message
There’s also the timing of when you send a message back. That’s pretty important as well. Chances are, you read the preview of their message immediately, but you decide that replying now would be a bad idea. It’d be too keen.Â
So you wait a few minutes and maybe even set a timer. You wait long enough to look like a person with a full and interesting life. It’s quite silly, but it’s true, and it’s so hard to stop doing.
Becoming brave at exactly the wrong moment
Being around your crush gives you a sense of bravery like nothing else. It makes even the dumbest idea seem like something good. Yes, you’ll take the bigger jump and try the thing you don’t normally do, just because you want to look fearless.
That’s pretty important when you’re trying to impress someone. You want to seem like someone who’s not afraid of anything, and above all, someone who looks cool. It’s quite embarrassing when you think about all the ‘dangerous’ stuff you’ve probably tried, just to impress them.
Sources: Please see here for a complete listing of all sources that were consulted in the preparation of this article.
6 ways to ask out your crush & 6 things to never do
Asking out your crush sure is awkward, and there’s definitely no easy way to do it, but there are some things to try or completely avoid.
