It’s hard to notice sometimes when a woman’s flirting at a bar because you expect big, romantic gestures, but in reality, the signs are a bit more subtle.
A small opening
It’s harmless. A question about what you’re drinking seems just like that, a question, and that’s why it works so well. She might already know what you’re drinking, and she might not actually care about it, but she’s using it as an entry point.
It’s an easy question that gives her the chance to start a conversation with you. No need for it to be a whole thing because you’re both talking now. Best of all, it doesn’t come off as rehearsed, so you genuinely think she’s interested in your drink. She’s probably not.
Menu trouble
She might even ask you questions about her own drink. Or, at least, the drink she’s going to order, as she asks for your recommendations. She doesn’t actually need help. The point here is that she’s trying to give you a low-stakes job to get you talking.
She’s encouraging you to be useful, to make a tiny decision with her. It doesn’t matter if you pick something awful because now, she’ll be able to tease you for it. Don’t overthink it.
Just for a second
A touch says a lot, even when you’re at the bar, and you might notice that she taps your arm a couple of times. Maybe she touches your shoulders. Touch is a good sign that someone’s interested, and the best kinds of touches are the ones that are completely subtle.
Nobody needs to make a big deal or anything. It’s just a second of contact, but in reality, it means a lot more than you might think.
Somehow nearby
She might not even be touching you, but instead, she keeps getting close to you, and every action seems to end with her being nearby. She might order and be close by, or maybe she’s by the music and somehow leans in toward you.
It’s easy to miss that sort of behavior because, yes, it does seem accidental. Bars are pretty crowded, so it’s only natural that people are going to be near each other. But a woman who keeps doing it? It’s a good sign that she’s interested and trying to make you realize that.
Same rhythm
You might notice that, as soon as you start being dry and sarcastic, she acts the same way. You become quiet, and she does that too. That’s a good sign of flirting because it means that she’s trying to make her behavior mirror yours.
You’re not exactly going to do that with someone you don’t care about. That doesn’t mean she copies you every single time, though. That’d be weird. However, if it happens enough for you to notice, then it likely means she’s flirting.
Pulled into the circle
Some women pull guys into their friend group, although it’s not because they’re trying to grill them or anything. They’re just flirting. Yes, they’ll get the guys to join the conversation and say things like, ‘Tell them what you just told me.’
Her friends might laugh along or they might challenge him. Their behavior doesn’t matter because what really does matter is the fact that she’s making you part of her friend group. She wanted you to be there. She’s interested.
A name appears
Perhaps you think she’s forgotten your name, and that’s why she’s using a silly name, based on your clothes or appearance. She hasn’t forgotten. No, she’s using the nickname so that she has a way of calling you back later without sounding too serious.
It becomes a kind of running joke. You know, the kind of running joke that gets you both smiling and that’s usually the start of an interesting relationship.
Not very impressed
Her words say one thing. Her actions say another. She tells you that your joke wasn’t funny and that your story was only average, sure, but she’s still hanging around. She keeps poking at you instead.
The truth is, she’s acting unimpressed to give the conversation a bit more of a bite and make things more interesting. It’s a way for her to hide her true feelings and continue playing the dating game. Funny how that works.
A stupid little wager
A pointless bet isn’t as pointless as it seems. It’s not like she’s actually trying to win or anything because she’s not that competitive, it’s more that she’s setting up some friendly competition to keep you both attached.
The prize can be something small, or maybe there isn’t one at all. It really doesn’t make a difference. She creates a stupid little bet to keep you guys talking. She’s really interested.
Guess wrong
Some sentences are dangerous, and ones that are like ‘Guess what I do’ are the most dangerous. She might also tell you, ‘Guess how old I am.’ She doesn’t really care about your answer because, really, she’s kind of hoping you’ll say something ridiculous.
It makes the moment a lot funnier. A guess that’s too young, too serious, too random, too much of anything, gives her an excuse to make a face. Small talk becomes a game that’s a lot more fun to play.
