Here are ten signs that you might be a narcissist without actually realizing it.
When the tone keeps turning downward
Check a clinical description of narcissism, and you’ll find comments about someone being ‘arrogant.’ But their behavior is much more low-key in real life. They’ll be impatient and sarcastic, with a habit of always pointing out what other people are doing wrong.
When it happens enough times, you get a reputation for being dismissive or overly-corrective.
When you disappear after feeling exposed
There comes a moment when you’re talking normally to someone, and then something slightly uncomfortable comes up. Your reaction? Stop engaging. You start sending shorter messages and avoiding calls because you’re trying to keep things surface-level.
It’s not always something you’re aware of, but it’s a sign that medical professionals claim is a way to stop you feeling exposed or vulnerable.
When praise feels required
Are you the kind of person who feels off when you don’t get praise? That might be because you have a strong need for admiration, even when nothing that big has actually happened.
You put in effort, and then you get annoyed because nobody notices. Eventually, you start expecting praise all the time, and that’s something that medical sources describe as a common trait in narcissists.
When criticism feels strangely personal
It’s normal not to like criticism. But narcissists take it one step further, as even small comments feel like a hit to them, leading to a reaction that’s much stronger than the situation calls for. They’ll shut down or get defensive or sharp.
Sometimes, both reactions happen at once, and it’s a major issue. Everything escalates on the inside, no matter how minor the criticism might be.
When “special” feels like a category
One of the strongest signs of narcissism is believing that you’re better than everyone around you. However, it shows up in slightly less obvious ways, such as the people you take seriously and who you don’t. This belief that you’re greater affects all of your everyday choices.
Unfortunately, most people miss that fact, as they’re expecting narcissists to walk around with an obviously huge sense of ego.
When other people become useful
Behind a narcissist’s normal relationships is manipulation. Sure, it’s not always clear, but it’s there, and it can sometimes look like staying close to people because they help you in some way. Clinical sources say it involves exploiting others to reach your own goals.
You might rely on them for connections or support, perhaps even attention. Then you drift away as the benefit disappears.
When empathy keeps getting skipped
You might think that you understand emotions, at least in theory. But are you actually thinking about them in real situations? Medical descriptions of narcissism often list a lack of empathy as one of the main traits, although it doesn’t mean you’re openly unkind.
Instead, you might ignore how something affects another person. You move on quickly from their bad day and refuse to change your behavior when you see they’re uncomfortable.
When ordinary rules seem optional
Some people’s sense of entitlement is pretty different from how you might expect it to be. It doesn’t always look like entitlement. In fact, you might find that you think things should go your way just because they make sense to you.
Perhaps you get frustrated because the rules apply to you the same way that they apply to everyone else, whether that’s waiting in line or simply being told no.
When your inner movie gets very grand
What goes on in your head is pretty important, and narcissists are the kinds of people who get caught up in fantasies about success, power, and the like. It goes beyond simple daydreaming.
They’re focused on a version of life where everything is bigger and better because it’s more impressive. Their reality may not match that vision, but who cares?
When other people’s success feels oddly irritating
Pay attention to how you react when someone else is doing well. You might find that you feel more uncomfortable than neutral, perhaps even envious, and you’ll show these feelings by downplaying their achievements.
Medical professionals say that envy of others, along with the belief that others envy you, are good signs that you might be a narcissist. It doesn’t have to be anything you do openly.
Sources: Please see here for a complete listing of all sources that were consulted in the preparation of this article.
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