Weddings in America have all kinds of interesting customs that catch most European guests off guard as we have some rather unique ways of celebrating the big day! Most of our special rituals are meant to make the wedding last and you’ll see people doing them before the big day, during the ceremony & at the reception. Here are twelve U.S. wedding traditions that confuse most Europeans. It’s not a real American wedding unless you have at least one of these!
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Rehearsal Dinners
It’s quite normal here to have a rehearsal dinner the evening before the wedding and it involves gathering for a formal meal after the practice ceremony that’s usually just for the immediate family. They’ll have toasts, speeches—and sometimes, even share slide shows in preparation for the big day! Europeans find this strange since they usually don’t have such organized gatherings before the wedding day.
Bridal Showers
Before the wedding, American brides often have a bridal shower hosted by friends or family & it’s essentially a daytime party where guests bring gifts to help the couple set up their home. There’s usually food, games and lots of conversation—it makes for quite a fun time! While it’s starting to be more popular in Europe, many people over there aren’t as familiar with this tradition because similar pre-wedding gift-giving parties aren’t as widespread.
Matching Bridesmaids’ Dresses
Bridesmaids usually wear matching dresses chosen by the bride at American weddings and these dresses are often identical in style & color—creating a coordinated look in the wedding photos. Lots of Europeans see such a practice as odd because their bridesmaids typically have more freedom to choose their own outfits without any instructions from the bride. But it’s her big day so, really, why wouldn’t she get a say in what her bridesmaids are wearing?!
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The “First Look” Photo Session
Many American couples arrange a private moment before the ceremony called the “first look” and it features the bride & groom seeing each other in their wedding clothes for the first time. A photographer takes pictures of the whole thing—yet not in Europe. Most people over there are strong believers that the groom shouldn’t see the bride before she walks down the aisle, so they keep the surprise for the ceremony.
Registries and Gift Lists
It’s completely normal here for couples to create a wedding registry at specific stores that lists items they’d like to receive as gifts, with guests later choosing from the list. In doing so, they make sure the couple gets things they need or want, although many Europeans see it as a little forward. Instead, they prefer to give gifts of their own choosing or money without being directed by a list.
Garter Toss
During the reception, the groom often removes the bride’s garter & throws it to the single male guests and the tradition is meant to spread good luck. However, Europeans might find it confusing or even inappropriate because publicly sharing such a personal moment isn’t typical in their weddings. It’s quite a surprising sight for them when they do see it happen!
Having an Open Bar
Lots of American weddings include an open bar where drinks are provided throughout the event at no charge and such generosity is relatively normal over here. Yet lots of European countries don’t have this tradition because it’s customary for guests to pay for their own drinks. Any open bars there usually have a far more limited selection that the hosts allow people to choose from.
Unity Candle Ceremony
A unity candle ceremony involves the bride & groom each taking a lit candle and lighting a larger one together—it symbolizes the joining of their lives. It’s a little extra flourish that’s uniquely American because it’s not really something you’ll find in wedding ceremonies across Europe. Instead, they have their own ways of showing that the couple is united.
Wedding Party Introductions
When the reception begins, the DJ or emcee will usually introduce the wedding party as they make a grand entrance and the event usually includes music—maybe even choreographed dances! Lots of Europeans might find this level of fanfare strange because formal introductions of the wedding party aren’t a standard part of their receptions. They allow the happy couple to enter the room without any of the flair you’ll see at American weddings.
Save-the-Date Cards
American couples usually send save-the-date cards months before the actual wedding invitation as it’s essentially a way to announce the wedding date early to allow guests to plan ahead. But most Europeans rely on a single invitation sent closer to the event and the idea of sending two separate notices isn’t common over there. In fact, some of them might think that doing so is a little excessive.
Dessert Tables Beyond the Cake
The wedding cake is a centerpiece at almost every wedding yet American weddings take it to the next level by having a full dessert table loaded with sweets. Europeans are surprised at such abundance—they think it’s strange for us to have so many cupcakes, cookies & candies! European weddings typically focus on the main cake and, for them, extra treats are an unnecessary indulgence.
Groom’s Cake
Speaking of cake, some American weddings include a groom’s cake alongside the main wedding cake and it’s usually themed around the groom’s hobbies or interests. For example, it could include his favorite sports team or pastime as a way to show off his personality. But having a second cake just for the groom is a uniquely American tradition that confuses Europeans.
Disclaimer: This list is solely the author’s opinion based on research and publicly available information.
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