Some people are always relaxed, although not in the laid-back-surfer way, and it’s more like they’re not trying to prove anything to anyone. That’s a sign of emotional security. They just avoid some weird behaviors other people do without even realizing it, and today, we’re looking at thirteen of these behaviors. How emotionally secure do you think you are?
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They Don’t Try To Control How They’re Seen
Everyone knows someone who might try to fix everything people think about them, but not emotionally secure people. They don’t rehearse how to look smart or funny in every interaction, because sometimes they’re awkward, and sometimes they’re quiet. For them, there’s no point in changing yourself, based on who’s watching. Nobody’s getting the filtered version.
They Don’t Pretend To Like Things To Fit In
You might have a friend who’s obsessed with some true crime podcast, and everyone else nods along while they’re talking about it. But they’re really just bored out of their minds. Emotionally secure folks won’t fake it, and they’re cool with saying that something isn’t their thing. They don’t need to agree to belong.
They Don’t Chase After People Who Ghost Them
After someone vanishes in the middle of a conversation and doesn’t text back, secure people take it on the chin. They won’t draft three versions of a message simply to just check in. They take the silence as a “no” and move on with their life, without overanalyzing or lurking. It’s not a game they’re trying to win.
They Don’t Overshare To Get Closer To Someone
That feeling when someone tells you way too much, way too fast, isn’t something you’ll get from secure people. They open up when it makes sense, not because they’re trying to speed-run intimacy or because they’re trying to force a connection out of thin air. They’ll simply be themselves and let the other person accept them for that.
They Don’t Rehearse Every Word Before A Conversation
You might pace around your kitchen, working out how to ask someone for a favor, but emotionally secure people don’t do that. Sure, they’ll think it through a little. But they don’t spiral into mock interviews in the shower, and they trust that whatever comes out will be fine. It might be a little messy, though.
They Don’t Apologize When They’re Not Sorry
Unless they did something wrong, an apology is simply not happening. Some may see it as rude, but really, they’re just being honest. When they’re sorry, it’s a totally different story, otherwise, you’re not getting a fake “sorry” to keep things comfortable and polite. That’s just not how these kinds of people roll.
They Don’t Laugh When They’re Not Amused
Someone could tell a joke that’s not their best work, and an emotionally secure person will let them know that. They’ll just smile politely, or maybe not even that. Either way, they’re not gonna fake a belly laugh to make you feel better, even though some people might think it’s mean. If they laugh, you definitely earned it.
They Don’t Keep Talking After Saying No
For an emotionally secure person, “no” is a complete sentence, and they won’t give any excuses for why they don’t want to do something. No fake excuses, just a simple no that may come off as rude. But really, they don’t bend over backward to sound agreeable, and they just said “no.” That’s the whole message.
They Don’t Join In To Avoid Being Left Out
It’s easy to feel like you have to go to an event because everyone else is, even though you’re really tired or not interested. However, these people just stay home. They don’t feel weird about skipping stuff, and they’re not worried about missing “something big.” They’d rather do what they want to do.
They Don’t Hold Onto Friendships Out Of Guilt
Sure, they might’ve known someone since middle school, but that doesn’t mean they’re gonna keep texting back out of duty. When the connection fades, they let it go, without any dramatic unfriending or hate. They simply spend less energy on something that’s not mutual anymore. They refuse to guilt-manage their contact list.
They Don’t Try To Win Fights By Getting Loud
There are those who go full volume when they feel like they’re losing an argument, yet none of those people are emotionally secure. As soon as things get too intense, they’ll walk away, which is much better than raising their voice, because they’re not trying to “win.” These people aren’t into shouting matches because, really, they know that no good comes from being loud.
They Don’t Interrupt Themselves
You’ll never see these people hedging before their opinion with statements like, “this probably doesn’t make sense, but—”. Rather, they say what they think and let you decide what to do with it, with no attempts at self-editing or giving reasons to dismiss them. They simply wait for you to respond first.
They Don’t Wait To See What Everyone Else Thinks First
We all hate those moments when we’re in a group trying to decide where to eat, and nobody has a clue. However, secure people speak up right away with their pick and refuse to look at people’s faces to make sure they’re not the “weird” one. They know what they want, and they’ll say it.
Disclaimer: This list is solely the author’s opinion based on research and publicly available information.
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