There’s a lot you can learn from watching what a woman does in public, especially when it’s in a crowded room where nobody asked her to be nice.
She opens the circle
We’ve all been in those groups where, yes, technically one person is part of it. But they’re also somehow not really in it. Nobody’s asking them questions or for their input, so it’s pretty much like they’re only there in spirit. The best women are the ones who do something about it.
Yes, they’ll turn to the ignored person and make sure they’re involved in the conversation. They’ll ensure this person is brought back into the room socially, in front of everyone else. They’ll give this person an opening to rejoin the group. They’re just that kind.
She invents the exit door
Her friend is stuck talking to someone who just won’t stop, and the questions are getting personal. She’s not going to let that happen. No, she’ll march right over and rescue her friend from the awkward conversation.
She won’t make a scene or give some long-winded explanation. She’ll simply overcome the awkwardness by giving her friend an escape route because, well, she’s considerate. She’s keen to help people out when they need rescuing.
She hands the floor back
It happens all the time. Interruptions are an unfortunate part of group conversations, and so is being around someone who steamrolls other people. But the best kind of woman is one who refuses to let that happen. They won’t give a lecture about manners because they’re more tactful than that.Â
They’ll just go back to the person who was originally talking and ask them to continue. These women recognize how awkward it is when you lose the floor, and they’ll fix the moment without making someone a charity case.
She names the person behind the idea
There are moments when it’d be so easy to take the credit for an idea, even when it wasn’t yours. For example, someone repeats an idea, and the room likes it. Nobody remembers who said it first. The greatest women are those who will directly say whose idea it was and make sure they get the praise for it.
They say the person’s name while everybody is still listening. That way, the person’s reputation gets built in the way that it should. These women could always give praise later, but no, they decide that public credit, right there, is better. They’re right.
She gives the newcomer something to do
Being a newcomer to a group often means dealing with a ton of inside jokes you don’t understand and many superficial comments like, ‘So glad you’re here.’ That’s not too bad. But what sets some women apart, however, is the fact that they’ll make sure the newcomer is included.
They’ll give them avenues into the conversation. They’ll say things like, ‘You have to tell us about your trip,’ or ‘Come sit with us, we’re arguing about terrible movies.’ It gives the other person something to say and someone to talk to, as well as a reason to stay.
She chooses the chair nobody wants
The seats beside the popular people tend to fill up first in a group, and there’s always one chair left beside the people nobody knows very well. Maybe it’s a seat near the person who doesn’t say much. This kind of woman will take that empty chair.
Then, she’ll sit down and start talking to that person like it was the obvious choice. It’s because she doesn’t pick favorites, and she knows that everyone has a story worth sharing. That single decision is enough to make somebody’s whole evening.
She says the nice thing after they leave
The timing of when you deliver praise is pretty important. You might notice how some women speak well of other people when they’re not there to hear it, even in a big group. The other person can’t hear it or thank her. They probably won’t even know it happened.
Still, these women know how much these comments can affect someone’s reputation, and how they can help others treat them later. In other words, they’re doing someone a favor behind their back, but in public. What a woman.
She makes the introduction that counts
It’s great being popular, it’s even better using that popularity to help somebody else. The greatest women know they’re someone who others listen to, so they’ll use that popularity to pull other people upward.
They’ll use their social weight as an advantage for someone who has less of it in that room. They might, for example, mention the other person’s work and back up their expertise. They’ve got plenty of attention already and are happy to share it.
She takes the slightly embarrassing job
Nobody likes dealing with uncomfortable moments in a group. You know, like when a stranger’s bag is in the way, or there’s a mix-up with a server. These amazing women will sort it out without being asked, and they do it in a kind way.
They give everyone else the chance to relax, instead of feeling awkward. Everyone sees that she’s sticking her neck out to help the group. She cares so much about everyone else that she wants to save them the cringe, and that’s a pretty great quality.
Sources: Please see here for a complete listing of all sources that were consulted in the preparation of this article.
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