If you thought you managed to keep up with the dating jargon, Gen Z will have you second-guessing that. They’ve created a whole new set of terms that are enough to make even the most in-the-know feel a bit outdated—just what is “ghosting” or “love bombing” anyway?! Here are fifteen overused Gen Z dating terms that might just make you feel like you need a translator. Who knows what bizarre terms they’ll use in the future?
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Ghosting
Ghosting happens when someone you’re talking to suddenly cuts off all communication without any warning or explanation—one moment you’re sending messages and the next, they’ve vanished without a trace. The rise of dating apps has made ghosting a common, albeit frustrating, part of relationships in the modern world. It’s enough to make anyone wonder just what on earth has gone wrong with our sense of respect for each other.
Caspering
Gen Z sees caspering as a “friendlier” form of ghosting and the term is named after Casper the Friendly Ghost—it involves giving someone a warning that you’re not interested before disappearing. You might get a polite message explaining they don’t see a future, followed by radio silence and while it seems considerate, disappearing after a brief explanation is still quite confusing. It’s nice that there’s some communication but it’s still not a full conversation about ending things.
Zombieing
Likewise, zombieing may sometimes happen after ghosting, as the person who ghosted you suddenly reappears out of nowhere by sending a casual text, acting as if nothing happened. It’s quite unfair because it reopens old wounds without any explanation or apology—just when you’ve started to move on, they come back to life in your inbox. They’ll refuse to give adequate reasons for their disappearance & sudden return, so you’re left deciding what to do.
Breadcrumbing
Breadcrumbing is when someone gives you just enough attention to keep you interested but never actually follows through with anything substantial, which could involve sending the occasional flirty text or social media message. These are the “breadcrumbs” that will keep you on the hook and such a strategy allows people to lead potential partners on—but without committing to a real relationship. It’s as manipulative as it sounds.
Benching
Here’s a term anyone who does sports will probably recognize—”benching” refers to keeping someone on standby while you explore other options. They might send you occasional texts or casual invites but they don’t make any real effort to move things forward. Essentially, they’re keeping you on the bench in case their first choices don’t pan out and that’s not how anyone should be treated.
Cushioning
Someone who participates in cushioning isn’t being as nice as you might think, as it actually involves chatting with or flirting with others while already in a relationship. The other person is the ‘cushion’ to fall back on in case things don’t work out with the original person’s significant other. It’s like a backup plan to soften the blow of a potential breakup, which raises some serious questions about commitment & honesty in the relationship.
Roaching
Similar to cushioning is roaching, which refers to discovering that the person you’re dating has been seeing multiple others behind your back. The name comes from the idea that when you see one cockroach, there are usually many more hiding—you might think you’re exclusive, only to find out they’re dating several people at once. They often justify it by saying they didn’t think it was serious or that you never had “the talk” but either way, it’s a breach of your trust.
Orbiting
Orbiting is when someone stops engaging with you directly but continues to interact with your social media—they might watch your stories or like your posts to keep themselves in your online orbit. Yet they refuse to actually reach out and doing so allows them to stay connected without making any effort to communicate. It’s really quite nasty behavior.
Haunting
Haunting is similar to orbiting but slightly creepier, as it’s when someone from your past keeps showing up online, like viewing your profiles or sending vague messages. They don’t engage directly, although they’ll make their presence known and this makes you feel confused about their intentions. You might notice they liked an old photo or suddenly followed you on a new app, but they never actually reach out to talk, as they prefer lurking in the background.
Paperclipping
Paperclipping is similar to haunting in that it involves someone popping back into your life occasionally just to keep themselves in your thoughts. They reach out yet don’t have any intention of actually reconnecting—they just want to make sure that you don’t forget about them. A paperclipper will never make plans or follow through and simply wants to keep the line open as a form of ego boost.
Fleabagging
Fleabagging is a term that comes from the TV show “Fleabag,” and it means repeatedly dating people who are obviously wrong for you and choosing partners who bring more chaos than happiness. It’s a hard pattern to break if you don’t recognize that you’re making unhealthy choices and you’ll probably continue to be attracted to the same types who aren’t good for you. The allure of the bad boy or girl keeps you fleabagging and stuck in a cycle of rocky relationships.
Stashing
When the person you’re dating doesn’t introduce you to their loved ones, Gen Zers call this “stashing”—the other person is keeping you separate from the rest of their life, almost like a secret. It’ll make you feel isolated and unsure about where you stand in the relationship and may also involve them avoiding taking photos with you. Any plans you make seem to be just the two of you, never involving their circle, because they’re content with hiding you.
Slow Fade
The slow fade is when someone gradually reduces communication until it eventually stops altogether, then slowly backs away instead of abruptly ending things, making it hard to understand when the relationship actually ended. It’s a drawn-out way of disappearing without having an honest conversation, which leaves you guessing about what’s going on. Are they busy or just losing interest?
Kittenfishing
You’ve probably heard of catfishing and kittenfishing is a lighter version of that, which involves presenting yourself unrealistically on dating apps or social media. For example, you might use outdated photos & exaggerate details, or perhaps ignore important information altogether. It’s not a complete lie, yet it creates false expectations when you meet in person, as honesty is important to building a real connection.
Love Bombing
You might think that receiving a lot of affection & attention right from the start is a good thing, but not for Gen Z—they call this love bombing and see it as a red flag for manipulative behavior. Love bombers come on strong, pushing the relationship forward quickly so that they’re able to control you later. You have to recognize the difference between genuine interest and overwhelming attention that doesn’t feel right.
Disclaimer: This list is solely the author’s opinion based on research and publicly available information.
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