Age 50 has its perks: wisdom, security and confidence to name a few. But it also has its private moments of humble jealousy when you look at 20-year-olds and see things you’ve lost or never really valued in the first place. Not the big-ticket stuff like energy or looks, but little everyday freedoms or basic advantages of youth you didn’t even know to envy until they were gone.
I talked with a group of 50-year-olds, and there’s a lot to miss about being 20, from small joys to big decisions, so here are 11.
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Forgetting everything easily
In your 20s, you can usually forget a name, appointment or whatever stressor came your way without a second thought. You make a mistake and it rolls right off your back. You can go from one day to the next without fretting over little failings. At fifty you’ll realize how much you miss that effortless grace to let things pass in silence.
Bouncing back from late nights
Going all-nighter, or staying up all night, is a lot less punishing when you’re 20. Sleep a few hours, and suddenly the day is not so bad after all. By 50, one late night can take days to recover from, and the 50-year-olds quietly marvel at how easily youth handled it back then.
Cheap experimentation
Youth is the season of cheap mistakes. Give something a go, fumble, learn, and move on. It’s what we do. But in midlife the stakes are much higher, financially, socially, and emotionally. That freedom to play around without fear is something many 50-year-olds quietly long for.
Low-risk love life
You can love freely when you’re young. There’s less risk and the stakes are lower, so you just experience that instant happiness. You make the same choices later, but there’s more consequences and opportunity for regret, so you miss that light-heartedness more.
Pure optimism
In your early twenties, answers are always right around the corner. Hopelessness is foreign. We were all naturally optimistic and made decisions without over-thinking it. There’s something about being 50 and having a jaded brain that saps away at some of that unchecked, joyful, raw optimism.
Body confidence without effort
Confidence is never earned when you’re young, it is simply there. By fifty, to feel good in your own body is a conscious act and the nonchalance of youth is quietly envied and recalled.
Minimal commitment stress
Life in your twenties is not that heavy. You can travel, work, or party on a whim. The future doesn’t weigh on you as it does later in life. Fifty-year-olds envy being able to live with so few ties and so much freedom.
The thrill of firsts
Everything feels easy when you’re twenty. A first time is different because it’s a first. A first ride, a first drink, a first love. Those unfiltered experiences are rare the older people get and they crave them more than they let on.
Spontaneous adventures
At 20 you can pack up and go on a weekend trip at the last minute. You can hop on a train to some place you don’t know and just see what happens. Later in life, responsibilities make that kind of carefree spontaneity feel almost impossible.
Friends around the corner
Your friends live within walking or driving distance of your high school or college. So when you need a buddy, you have five minutes to decide and are always only a few blocks from a friend. In your 50s, your friend groups are all over the place due to careers, children, or just moving.
Skin that bounces back
Skin elasticity is different when you’re young. The planet seems to accelerate the healing process on young skin. A small cut, bruise, or late-night physical will fade away much faster. Wrinkles are nonexistent. You might think this is a shallow one, but many people in their 50s quietly envy how low the bar is for 20-year-olds to look “fresh” after a stressful or fatigued week.
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